Project Idea: Cat Armor!


Nice one, @Holoprincess! Here’s mine:

Corinne loves her taxidermy
To be honest, it makes me squirmy
But she’s making something faux
And for that, I’m good to go!

And here’s a brand new thought
Something that could be kind of hot
Make a faux stuffed kitty
Covered in armor that’s really pretty

That cat could stand in a pose
Like going into battle, or holding a rose
It could be covered from head to tail
In shiny, strong, homemade chain mail!

And then you can pretend it’s for
A memento of the KITTY WAR
That this faux kitty lost her life
In a battle full of strife

But it wouldn’t be a body
’Cause that’s gross and kind of shoddy
It would be a faux feline
And you could call it mine, all mine

So, Corinne, it’s really easy
To make cat armor that isn’t cheesy
So grant my battle cat wish
And serve it up like a delicious dish!


Oh, snap! @RobCzar made dicks on sticks, so I had to make a slightly naughty poem to go with:

Rob is deep frying dicks
And he’s eating them off of sticks
To show his cat’s not a pussy
Make some armor, she’s no wussy!

Whether it is hard and long
Or short and thick and very strong
Everyone loves a battle spear
(Did you think I meant something else here?)

Rob really likes being naughty
With phallic symbols and a mouth a’potty
He may get a bunch of crap
So protect your cat from ears to lap

You’re paid attention to my rhymes
I’ve written poems many times
Make sure you keep her very pretty
When you make some armor for your kitty!


:joy: yeah I figured I’d let you take this video this time


So @RobCzar tasted some Oreos, and I’m proud of my incorporation of them into this poem:

Oreo cookies are filled with cream
But you know what could meme?
Shiny armor on your kitty
Especially if you made it pretty.

You have tried every flavor
But if you could do the favor
Of making armor for your cat
I’d be very happy with that.

Rob is good at the taste testing
But that kitty could be besting
Other soldiers, or maybe knights
It’s well within her rights.

But if she does go into war
What is all that armor for?
To protect her, should she fail
A bit of defense from head to tail.

Even if she sees no battle
Don’t make your kitty into cattle
Maybe she needs some protection
If a horde comes in her direction

To steal her cookies all away
Thieves could steal in any day
Your cat could get into some rows
By protecting Rob’s Oreos!

I have asked you many times
I have made up many rhymes
I don’t want to have a spat
So make some armor FOR YOUR CAT!


@RobCzar YEAH ROB YOU HIPPIE If this isn’t the next threadbanger video I’m suing


So @CorinneLeigh made Dragon’s Beard, and I wrote this!

You are eating dragon’s beard
You know what would be really weird?
If your cat could slay a dragon
On a horse or in a wagon.

But if your cat goes to war
How will she face that dangerous chore?
She will need to have some armor
So no dragon can possibly harm her!

You know you could sew it well
Give your kitty a protective shell
Make some armor, she cannot fail
If you make her kitty chain mail.

All her enemies will be well met
If you build her a shiny helmet
Maybe give a sword to weiild
Some boots, some gloves, maybe a shield!

So Corinne, you see what I mean
You could make it for Halloween!
Let your kitty slay the lizard
Sew her armor like you’re a wizard!

I keep making all these tomes
By writing you many poems
Surely you will hear my plea
And make some kitty armor for me!



Its not cat armor! I’m suing!!


Rob made invisible ink, but I made sure you can see my comment:

Invisible ink, you cannot see
You know what would be cool to me?
If you made something really cute,
Like for your kitty, an armor suit.

Cats rarely go to battle
Because they’re tiny, and would die like cattle
But if they were well-protected
By some armor, they could be directed

Out onto the field where they could fight
Because each cat would be a knight!
Or maybe they’d be something more wry
Like an ancient Samurai!

But it can’t happen, heaven knows
Because there’s no kitty who really sews
That is why they outsource that job
To clever people like Corinne, or Rob!

It would just take some tin and glue
A little chain mail and leather, too!
And every kitty would be well met
By having a teeny battle helmet!

So come on, it’d be peachy keen
For your cat, on Halloween
To wear a costume, it wouldn’t harm her
To have a custom suit of armor!


I’m going to be spamming rob until he does this :stuck_out_tongue:


Today, @Rob made Haunted Figurines, so I wrote this Haunted Poem:

Rob has made a figurine
I am sure it’s peachy keen
You know what would really top that?
If he made some armor for his cat

Haunted figures are so creepy
But Rob and Corinne would be so weepy
If your kitty had no armor
And her enemies could go and harm her

It shouldn’t take too much toiling
And you know that I am spoiling
For some armor from head to tail
In faux leather or fake chain mail

It is almost Halloween
(As you know from your figurine)
Maybe your kitty could be needing
A knight’s costume for trick or treating!

So let’s celebrate your tiny hauntings
But I would like to stop my tauntings
And asking you in so many rhymes
For cat armor so many times.

Hear my request, hear my plea
Make a suit of armor for me
I promise you I’ll lose my anger
And keep watching y’all on ThreadBanger!


And tonight, @CorinneLeigh made a giant spider, so I wrote this!

Spider, sitting on the globe
Don’t be an arachnophobe!
If your cat encounters a spider
Nothing magic can ever hide her.

She will need some protection
If a giant spider goes in her direction
Maybe so that it doesn’t harm her
Your kitty needs some kitty armor!

Your kitty doesn’t need to settle
For anything but shiny metal
To be protected from head to tail
In light, knitted rope chain mail.

Then she can be so well-met
By putting on a custom helmet
And kitty can go face her fears
In armor from her feet to ears.

So hurry Corinne, hurry Rob
Make sure it’s like doing your job
I’ve rhymed so many times that
You can’t not make armor for your cat!!



Though I still don’t have that armor yet, Rob called me a “Cat armor loving motherf**ker” on the livestream tonight, so that’s a good Friday the 13th present for me. Thanks, @Rob and @CorinneLeigh!


Haha well I keep spamming their comments so, hopefully we will see cat armor soon!


I finally was able to watch the live show @xingcat and I’m super excited, but rob for got to mention me, you’re sidekick, lol . but no robs reaction was pretty great! :joy:


Rob made candy corn shot glasses, so here’s a candy corn themed poem:

Your candy corn has been deep fried
But how about something you haven’t tried?
Maybe armor for your cat
You know everyone would like to see that!

You could even make it pretty
That shiny armor for your kitty
For Halloween you could adorn
Your cat in armor made of candy corn!

Then your cat wouldn’t face defeat
She’d head into battle looking sweet
She could slay a dragon, save a fellow
In armor of orange, white and yellow!

After battling, enemies meeting
She could go out trick or treating
And know that nothing would harm her
In her fancy suit of armor

Maybe this is something you could try
Corinne’s the gal and Rob’s the guy
They have all the fancy skills
To make some armor that really thrills

I keep asking, every time!
I may someday run out of rhyme
But I don’t want to whine
Please make some armor for your feline!


Oh, I was SO EXCITED when @CorinneLeigh said she had FIVE projects tonight, but NO! NO ARMOR! Even her kitty showed up and was all, “What the hell, man?”

So another poem!

Fingers and pizzas and bears, oh my!
But you know what I want you to try.
I keep wondering where it’s at.
That lovely armor for your cat.

I showed you patterns, uploaded pics
But I guess it’s just one of my tics
That I think kitties going into battle
Wear some armor, to not be like cattle.

Pizza skulls are fine and dandy
But some chain mail comes in handy
It’s also as cute as a panda sneeze
When your cat faces her enemies.

With some thread and maybe leather
She’d be outfitted for any weather
A pattern and some glue would yield
A chest plate, booties, and maybe a shield.

And while finger candles are quite drippy
Your cat’s a soldier, she ain’t no hippie!
So make sure that she’s really well-met
With a uniform, including a helmet.

Halloween’s coming, don’t make me ill
Please, Corinne, you have the skill
You can make it tough and pretty


Come on @RobCzar and @CorinneLeigh CRISTINE from SIMPLY NAILOGICAL dressed up THEIR cat!! STEP UP YOURE GAME YOU HIPPIES


Not trying to interrupt the fun, but am I the only one that sees something wrong with the mail armour depicted? Or am I just to nit-picky?


Maybe with some of the pictures, yes but it is possible if you believe!!


Sorry, but I don’t know what you mean. I was just talking about the fact that this is butted mail and when we want to protect our kitties, we need riveted mail.